The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @lopp ever

July 2009

In a non-scalable architecture, the amount of hardware required to address your performance problems quickly approaches infinity.

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snoochie boochies

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bring-your-stash-to-work day 3.0 has been yet another resounding success - several terabytes exchanged.

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why everything sucks - http://idek.net/MXH - society’s deification of youth

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Don’t let the world bring you down |
Not everyone here is that fucked up and cold |
Experience the warmth before you grow old.

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if i could work 6am to 3pm, i would do it in a heartbeat

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RT @mike9r: New Super Mario Bros 4 coming to the Wii looks really awesome, back to its glory days [video]: http://idek.net/MTc

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there are so many options with a 2 week beard, @mattmeis - i’m singlehandedly bringing mutton chops back into style http://twitpic.com/c5sgu

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having to wait 2+ hours for your computer to boot due to a forced file system check on a 5 TB RAID array is most inconvenient

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even @pbrown will want in on that! that’s him, right?

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but seriously though… instead i guess i’ll found the first motorcycle polo club in the USA! http://idek.net/MGB

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i can only play racquetball for another TWO WEEKS because the @$*(! YMCA is closing. how am i to keep in such awesome shape? … ladies?

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@sweetlydrifting: do you have a loan or visa through SECU? I haven’t been able to get them to show up on mint…

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suffering from clutch fatigue compounded by foosball fatigue. gotta lay off the foos…

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@goddamndave: real men only shoot lead

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GET READY TO RIDE THE LIGHTNING! http://idek.net/M1Y

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@akuaa: some people just don’t see us. i’ll be riding on a bright yellow bike in bright yellow gear and they pull out in front of me

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This is why I need rocket launchers mounted on my motorcycle (this BS happens far too often) http://idek.net/L.n

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“Technologists are replacing religion, and their ideas are resonating in some ways with the same idea of the Rapture.” http://idek.net/LyL

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you can all stop asking why i don’t have a matching helmet now; yellow is in the mail http://idek.net/LnH

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“If he were a careful man, he might have lived longer… but would he have enjoyed life as much?”

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@sweetlydrifting: was just wondering if they HAVE a web API that would allow 3rd parties to integrate with their web services

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hey @sweetlydrifting, does NC SECU have a web API? I’m guessing not, and that mint is just screen scraping…

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signed up for mint - impressed thus far but can’t get it to sync my BB&T mortgage, NCSECU Visa, & NCSECU loan accounts :-(

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better start scrutinizing all the crows you see - it could be worth a thousand dollars - http://idek.net/LdV

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i compiled a bucket list and then noticed that the items were in order of decreasing danger, which is probably counterproductive…

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wish i could communicate to remi that weekends are the exception to waking up at 5:30

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it’s always a pleasant surprise to find that you have so much ammo stockpiled that a trip to the range costs practically nothing

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@seanmcnichol: friend of a friend has a BAR, idk how he got it…

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shooting range expedition with my .45s, a 9mm, and a browning automatic rifle

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drinking champagne from monty python’s holy grail. it feels so right.

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nobody at the pool… perfect time for a swim.

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<insert random conversation> “Haven’t you heard? There’s an app for that!”

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most hilarious thing i’ve seen while riding: some cracked out guy on a moped flapping his arms trying to get me to do a wheelie

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@seanmcnichol: it’s just for use in ads on facebook. for ex, you might show up in an ad for some online dating site, you hunk ‘o man meat

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I love how I can’t opt out of the new 3rd party ads setting on @facebook because I’m running Linux. The whole page is blank. F U again, FB.

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surprise, surprise. 91 percent of the market for computers that cost over $1000 now belongs to Apple. http://idek.net/LIV

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almost hit a doe and her fawn in my neighborhood; would not have ended well for either party

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“The First Rule of Code Optimization: Don’t do it. The Second Rule of Code Optimization (experts only): Don’t do it yet.” - Michael Jackson

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ditto, @sweetlydrifting - my morning coding output is about 300% of what I get done in the afternoon. also, folks tend to interrupt me then.

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I may be a cutting edge geek, but deep down I’m really an Old Fashioned kind of guy…

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3… 2… 1… segmentation fault. core dump in progress.

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http://twitpic.com/b7s1r - I’m interested to know how folks use virtual desktops. I dedicate a screen for twitter, email, firefox, ssh t …

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The significant problems that we are facing today cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them.

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@mattmeis: google wave isn’t anything in particular yet; it’s a platform for online collaboration. We’ll see what apps are built on it

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When stuck in a traffic jam with a Porsche, you simply burn more gas at idle. Scalability is about building wider roads, not faster cars.

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Most people look at a glass holding 50% water and see it as half empty or half full. Engineers see a glass twice as big as it needs to be.

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i love riding on brisk summer mornings; the cold air streaming past to wake me up, the hot engine wash going over my legs to keep them warm

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norway approves of @starbucks caramel macchiato ice cream. by the way, thanks for the free pint @starbucks

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More computing sins are committed in the name of efficiency than for any other single reason - including blind stupidity.

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Artificial morality and values are subjective, elastic, fungible and impermanent. That which is self-evident requires no ‘belief.’

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<sigh> Google Reader, stop trying to add twitter-like features. I don’t need to see the 3000+ users that ‘liked’ today’s XKCD.

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ran L4D under WINE last night and it was playable, though dropped to ~10 FPS under intense sequences. forums suggest settings tweaks…

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after a year of trying, i have successfully bred my red cherry shrimp

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i would take up golf if i were allowed to play with a shotgun - this guy is insanely skilled http://idek.net/KNW

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saved 2 critters today - 1 large turtle relocated from the street to the lake; 1 baby tree frog that was stuck in pool is back in the woods

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extremely productive morning: bike inspected, hair cut, house siren repositioned toward street, lawn mowed, sink disassembled and unclogged

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some people say i tweet about star trek too often. here’s my rebuttal: http://idek.net/K9j

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@sweetlydrifting: code reviews are easy if you use the standard scale of WTFs per minute

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jesse ventura rips fox a new one - http://idek.net/K4c - it is our duty as citizens in a democracy to QUESTION AUTHORITY

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50% chance of rain means I’ll be riding the motorcycle. 50% chance of rain means the other riders will pussy out - more parking room for me.

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@kristengreg: A is for Apathy by Powerman 5000

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i love my Fellowes™ foot rest, but @goddamndave hates it because i’m a foot tapper when good tunes are playing

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please differentiate ‘push’ and ‘pull’ data. E.g. weather forecasts should be pulled by you on demand, not pushed to you hourly via twitter.

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surprise surprise, folks stopped buying overpriced motorcycles! harley’s profits down 91% from a year ago - http://idek.net/Jyq

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motorcycle oil changed in ~20 min - so much easier than a car. no jacks required; and I don’t even have to remove the fairings on my model!

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We walk a long road /
Trying to find the essence of self /
Hope I picked the right clothes /
Helmet with a gat under my belt

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will computers ever be fast enough that actions you take are instantaneous? or will software continue to use more resources? i vote latter.

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net new code is rarely written in its optimal state

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goal for today: first oil change on the CBR 900

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consistency fail: the parameter order for some php array / string search function is (needle, haystack) while others is (haystack, needle)

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FYI motorcycle riders: you can legally pass through a red light if the sensor doesn’t trip. i have to all the time - http://idek.net/Ji6

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When will we learn? When will we change? Just in time to see it all come down?

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i consider myself a fairly proficient writer - when i have something to say. but i’ve never had the URGE to write… until now.

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@seanmcnichol: becoming a career politician certainly increases likelihood of exposure to corruption. can we prevent corruption completely?

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I can only hope that some day the world will have to grapple with the issue of intellect discrimination… would that be such a crime?

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But wait.. the average IQ of John Q Public is 100. Just brings me back again to my concept of instituting IQ reqs for lawmakers

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Long story short… ban lobbyists and let the public speak for themselves

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They govern us, but without accountability. Their mission is not to protect the public, but to maximize profits. Just look @ health care…

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Much of our democracy is already lost, and no one is noticing. We don’t understand the concept of government being private corporations.

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i’ve decided that i CAN listen to country music… if it is accompanying a striptease

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sci-fi fans: you HAVE to go see Moon - it’s not at any major theaters but it’s the next Space Odyssey. trailer here - http://idek.net/7lL

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you know I would buy one… it’s the next logical step http://idek.net/JNv

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I refuse to perform mindless tasks which can be delegated to a machine. This includes bill payments! Won’t debit me? Kiss my money goodbye.

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Chuck Norris doesn’t need Twitter. He’s already following you.

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I truly believe now that you appreciate life more when you risk it once in a while. Who wants to go skydiving? $200 in Raeford…

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Java, Colombian, or French Roast;
Thy every flavour, I will toast.
To the end thy loyal slave,
Three cups a day I will always crave.

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I’d like gas prices to go back up, because then my 401K would go back up as well…

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Live now. Make now always the most precious time; now will never come again.

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back in one piece. the stretch of 58 between 85 and 95 is the nicest wooded highway on which i have ridden.

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i’ll leave it to my man @seanmcnichol to tweet my eulogy if i don’t make it back from his new digs. going AFK; this is @lopp signing off.

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taking the rocket on an extended ride tomorrow morning http://idek.net/IvS YES, you can cruise on a sport bike. I’ll be wearing ear plugs.

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“Shaving is a human art form, Data. Technological perfection can shave too close.”

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“You’re right, someone blew out the hatch. They were all sucked out into space.”
“Correction, sir. That’s, ‘Blown out’.”
“Thank you, Data.”

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the first nubs of corn ears have appeared… the wait is almost over

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apparently the ConAgra plant that blew up was the ONLY slim jim maker in the US - fans are prepping to weather a drought http://idek.net/IdN

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i think we need to run down to the store and get some blocks of ice for the server room

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incomprehensible magic:

find . -name ‘.svn’ -prune -o -type f -print0 | xargs -0 sed -i -e :a -e ‘/^\n*$/{$d;N;};/\n$/ba’

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http://twitpic.com/9mk5n - the racquetball gang, with Phil “The Captain” Hayes front and center.

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Me: “Hi, I’m calling regarding the ___ posting on Craigslist”

Them: “Oh. They’s got sold.”

Me: “…”

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Peter’s Principle: All new members in a hierarchical organization climb the hierarchy until they reach their level of maximum incompetence.

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dare i drop $280 on an in-home mobile phone signal booster? it would pay for itself in a year if i cancel vonage…

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i quite enjoyed ‘burn-e’ but i doubt pixar will ever be able to top ‘for the birds’ http://idek.net/ICF

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http://twitpic.com/9f3cn - remi loves his blue balls as much as i

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why does almost nobody on craigslist have any common courtesy? maybe it’s just people in general and their lack of netiquette.

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homemade fireworks FTW

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i was looking forward to shit blowing up today, but not mysql shard 4…

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the early bird finds the bug in the nightly cronjobs

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craigslist needs to implement captchas for you to be able to email a poster - the # of spambots that respond to my listings is unacceptable

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You see, a pimp’s love is very different from that of a square

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http://twitpic.com/96qn5 - the corn is mature and ready to get it on…

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my biggest problem with star trek: why would you ever travel at warp 1-8 when you could be traveling at warp 9?

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huge sign @ food lion said “enter 4 a chance 2 win a chrome grill” - i did a double-take

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just switched usenet providers after 5 yrs - $8/mo for unlimited bandwith, 365 day retention, 20 SSL connections http://idek.net/HpP

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Direct workflow
Micromanage
Promote Synergy
Send faxes
Call a sex line
Fifth of vodka
Buy a gun
Score some coke
Crash my car
… LIKE A BOSS

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the conduit looks awesome, but the reviews indicate either you love it or hate it. has anyone played it yet?

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most unique glass ever for pint night at tyler’s: http://bit.ly/13TNSR

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