The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @lopp ever

October 2011

Just ran into a captcha with a π symbol in it. Not cool, @reCAPTCHA, not cool.

via web

jefft just another Halloween at @Bronto http://t.co/rXGFiXkr

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 9:23 AM, Oct 31st, 2011 via web)

You tend not to appreciate the lubricative qualities of body hair until after it’s gone.

via web

Try as I might, I just don’t “get” poached eggs.

via twicca

DEVOPS_BORAT For Halloween I am dress as LDAP server. I not like talk to anybody.

via web (retweeted on 10:25 AM, Oct 29th, 2011 via web)

flyosity White House response to petition on treating marijuana like alcohol misses every key fact about the issue. http://t.co/8MZc04iY

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 10:24 AM, Oct 29th, 2011 via web)

@MichaelCasp @robbielimejello this is getting a little too weird for me

via web in reply to MichaelCasp

@jefft I didn’t say - I - was sticking to Twitter!

via web in reply to jefft

@jefft guess you’d better stick to Twitter, then…

via web in reply to jefft

@dapak at Suzanne’s desk

via web in reply to dapak

Testing out @bronto’s newest acquisition: Giant Jenga http://t.co/d1DarUfF

via twicca

Just followed a @google Street View car in Durham… except that it was a @NAVTEQ car. Good luck winning THAT battle!

via web

@ameir that’s not bad enough to earn you any Reddit karma

via web in reply to ameir

DemetriMartin Forecast: Today’s high depends on what you are taking.

via web (retweeted on 2:22 PM, Oct 26th, 2011 via web)

Working on the Halloween costume while weighing the merits of staying true to character against the likelihood of getting fired.

via web

Traffic circles will be the death of me yet. Just had someone miss my rear wheel by 6 inches entering the circle while I had right-of-way.

via web

There’s a Steve Jobs quote on the window of this burger joint. Deification complete.

via twicca

ncpolicelogs This is the face of a stone cold criminal. Bitch, real Gs move in silence like lasagna. http://t.co/D21PAINp

via Tweet Button (retweeted on 10:54 AM, Oct 25th, 2011 via web)

I put the “funk” in “functional alcoholic”

via web

We need Dungeon Masters for the real world - life is a game, but the rewards system is broken. http://t.co/va9jCaTo via @julien

via Tweet Button

“Democracy is like a tambourine - not everyone can be trusted with it.” - John Oliver

via twicca

@carolinewv psssssst delete that crap

via web in reply to carolinewv

just watched a truly sick fuck do standup at @dpac - I <3 @louisck

via twicca

Folks keep telling me to be PC, but I’m incapable of transforming into a personal computer.

via web

If you call yourself an “Online Marketeer” I hate you even more than if you call yourself a “Social Media Expert”

via web

As the Occupation spreads, so does the Police State. OWS has exposed the Militarization of US Law Enforcement. http://t.co/AMRznq0K

via web

Economic collapse explained in 3 minutes: http://t.co/Pkcv11as

via web

There are support groups for people who drive too fast: they’re called race tracks. Please seek help if you have a problem.

via web

mattmeis I’ve said it before, & I’ll say it again: Locking your tweets is like putting a nickel in a vault. You aren’t as special as you might think.

via web (retweeted on 6:41 PM, Oct 19th, 2011 via web)

In 100% of all fake-gun-related shootings, the victim is always the one with the fake gun.

via web

RT @Bitterjojo: Those glove shoes are a great way to identify assholes at the gym.

via web

H_Salamanca GDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGINGDINGDINGDING http://t.co/wY9UMZUF

via Twitpic (retweeted on 7:18 PM, Oct 18th, 2011 via web)

@jefft @pmccall777 buzz buzz buzz. When I was a kid, we had mobile social local contests called RIDING BIKES AROUND.

via web in reply to jefft

@qwertying @adamrawlings some people marry non-humans

via web in reply to qwertying

ncpolicelogs You need a place to store your bong. Do you choose D) the glove box where you also keep your registration? http://t.co/e1SapUX3

via web (retweeted on 8:46 AM, Oct 18th, 2011 via web)

The smiling face of an oblivious cager is the last thing many motorcyclists ever see.

via web

alexbonin Maintaining homeostasis

via web (retweeted on 4:42 PM, Oct 17th, 2011 via web)

Almost wrecked the bike this morning when I passed a heavily pregnant woman who was smoking.

via web

Roasted pumpkin seeds, like most foods, are enhanced with a dash of the Cock Sauce. http://t.co/lmqV9LIh

via web

@jefft @ameir @gigq @flyosity I’m looking forward to you guys showing off Siri to me http://t.co/Lvzc3CKZ

via web in reply to jefft

I must say, @mikestable is setting the bar high in his campaign for @bronto social committee http://t.co/9WTswMpl

via twicca

@flyosity @ameir come on guys, the dude probably has 5,000 iPhones to not deliver today - give him a break.

via web in reply to flyosity

@jefft I was going for the more obscure items, but thanks for the input

via web in reply to jefft

Things that are better naked: motorcycles, guns, dsl, batteries, beaches

via web

It was a rush job, but I think my hipster bronto painting turned out OK http://t.co/Sl1iPFZV

via twicca

@ameir Apparently Sherifi also was found guilty of two weapons counts. That’s downright un-American!

via web in reply to ameir

@ameir Sounds like it would have been pretty tough to find their peers. I mean, shit, I only have 3 guns and 500 rounds of ammo myself!

via web in reply to ameir

SamuelLJackson Can-a muh fukkasay fuck on here?

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 2:19 PM, Oct 13th, 2011 via web)

@mark_a_phelps @flyosity @bmf I bet they’re the same jackasses who were gushing over Sussman’s incredibly dry keynote.

via web in reply to mark_a_phelps

@bmf WHAT? Point out who didn’t like your presentation and I’ll take care of the rest.

via web in reply to bmf

SteveMcQuaid The University of North Carolina, the nation’s first public university, is 218 years old today. #UniversityDay #UNC #GoHeels

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 1:28 PM, Oct 12th, 2011 via web)

The biggest challenge of working at @bronto is not going insane from @dawleywood’s music. Currently playing: Nyan Cat smooth jazz remix.

via web

I was perhaps a little too excited to see Jaleel White make an appearance on a recent episode of House.

via web

Hi, I’m a software engineer. I want to make your job obsolete.

via twicca

A true patriot must be ready to defend his country against his government. -Edward Abbey

via web

I only read Reddit for the articles, I SWEAR. Especially now that /r/jailbait has been shuttered.

via web

Reports coming in of coordinated moves by riot police against Occupy Wall Street protestors at 2AM in several major cities… cowards!

via twicca

At this rate, Breaking Bad may very well surpass The Wire for Best TV Show of All Timeâ„¢

via web

@ericboggs damn, I’m going to call and ask for a blowjob

via web in reply to ericboggs

@Jeremy_DeGroot SHHHH I was leaving those as a surprise in case someone tries any funny business.

via web in reply to Jeremy_DeGroot

Nobody break into my house for the next few days - the system board for the alarm controller melted down.

via web

GPS logged google map of my Iron Butt ride over the weekend: http://t.co/UYsRECqo

via web

@flyosity I think you mean can’t TOUCH type - he types just fine!

via web in reply to flyosity

@ameir Nice. Karma thievery is a sincere form of flattery.

via web in reply to ameir

I’m not entirely sure why, but seeing Twitter hash tags as watermarks on TV shows is really pissing me off.

via web

Completed the Iron Butt Bun Burner challenge by riding 1,500 miles in 33 hours, 59 minutes.

via web

late lunch in Florence, SC

via twicca

Just completed the Iron Butt Saddle Sore challenge by riding 1,000 miles in 16 hours, 43 min. Headed to ATL for a nightcap w/ @alexbonin

via twicca

Having dessert in Birmingham

via twicca

Highways with minimum speeds tell me the locals needed to have common sense legislated for them

via twicca

@pmccall777 @mikestable I’m waiting to hear @dawleywood’s opinion on this matter

via twicca in reply to pmccall777

Memphis for dinner!

via twicca

@emilepetrone just doing a 1500 mile motorcycle ride this weekend

via twicca in reply to emilepetrone

Lunch in Knoxville

via twicca

Breakfast in Hickory

via twicca

Sunrise in the rear view http://t.co/tuyyTEWx

via twicca

Departing for Memphis. The clock is running; 36 hours to complete 1500 miles.

via twicca

T-minus 9 hours to launch; all conditions are “go” for launch.

via web

@seanmcnichol yep, the Prime is supposed to be the new hotness. Advantages being it’s a pure Google phone; no bloatware installed on it.

via web in reply to seanmcnichol

@hoorayimhelping SOMEONE ON THE INTERNET HAS A GIRLFRIEND?!

via web in reply to hoorayimhelping

dawleywood More Jobs lost under Obama’s watch

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 10:36 PM, Oct 5th, 2011 via web)

SiriLogs “Siri, make me a sandwich”
“Fuck off”
“Siri, sudo make me a sandwich”
“Don’t let the pink fool you, asshole.”

via Twitter for Mac (retweeted on 4:37 PM, Oct 5th, 2011 via web)

@flyosity Oh, you mean what Google Translate has been doing for 6 months?

via web in reply to flyosity

DRUNKHULK TWO BEER EMERGE FROM FRIDGE! AND DRUNK HULK! DRUNK HULK TAKE LESS FROSTY ONE! AND THAT MAKE ALL DIFFERENCE!

via web (retweeted on 4:08 PM, Oct 5th, 2011 via web)

michaelkbusch Truly outrageous that 99% of the cookies are consumed by 1% of the monsters on PBS. #occupysesamestreet

via web (retweeted on 11:37 AM, Oct 5th, 2011 via web)

@Jeremy_DeGroot The Iron Butt Bun Burner (1500+ miles in 36 hours)

via web in reply to Jeremy_DeGroot

My plans for this weekend: http://t.co/p7LwrAPM

via web

In the real world, winners know when to quit. Don’t fall victim to the sunk cost fallacy.

via web

@seanmcnichol I, personally, would choose the Galaxy S II. http://t.co/HKCJB6wY

via web in reply to seanmcnichol

VeryShortStory After two days of riots, Steve rose from the ashes and returned to work. He waved his hand, the 4S was renamed 5 and the masses rejoiced.

via Twittelator (retweeted on 3:50 PM, Oct 4th, 2011 via web)

VeryShortStory “Throw down your gun!” they yelled.
I fired at the bulldozer through the open window, defending the library against the onslaught of Kindles

via Ping.fm (retweeted on 1:51 PM, Oct 4th, 2011 via web)

Frustration is Googling for documentation and all but one of the results are YOUR OWN POSTS ASKING FOR AN EXPLANATION. http://t.co/A5WT701U

via web

While taking out all the pint glasses from my cabinets because I decided I had too many, I dropped (and broke) an armload. Problem solved.

via web

When you have fat rolls on your shins it might be time for drastic action.

via web

@mikestable P.S. when will you learn to call ME?

via web in reply to mikestable

@mikestable were the burglers unsuccessful?

via web in reply to mikestable

Protesting “corporate greed” makes you sound like dirty hippies. Protesting “lack of corporate accountability” makes you informed citizens.

via web

ddahlke Woot, divorce is final!

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 5:42 PM, Oct 2nd, 2011 via web)

@tab126 james joyce every sunday at 0930

via twicca in reply to tab126

This weekly “Motorcycle Sunday Brunch” event should be renamed “Team Divorce Lollerskating Group”

via web

The hardness of the butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.

via web

Bitterjojo If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself.

via web (retweeted on 10:46 AM, Oct 1st, 2011 via web)